Radiation, DONE!

My 28th and FINAL day of radiation, YESSS!!  The Dr's office presented me with the above certificate and more importantly a Lindt hazelnut/milk chocolate bar, MMMMM!!  I thought that was a nice gesture.

One of the three areas that received radiation is very tender.  The armpit.  It gets chaffing from my bra and compression arm band so I have had to switch things up a bit.  I hope it will heal quickly.  I keep using the "Earths Daughter aloe Vera," Miaderm and Aquaphor the doctor gave me.  Yeowza😣!  

Hair growth at 3 months

Loo

More hair, YAAY!  Looking at the difference between last ,month and this month, I am going to have to say that the Nioxin products are doin' their thang!  Thanks to my stylist Stefany Thornton for telling me about them!

Managing Lymphedema

During my second week of radiation, I noticed/felt that my right arm was swelling.  My Lymphedema seemed to be getting worse.  Radiation may have something to do with that.  I decided to check in with my Occupational Therapist Elsa.  I hadn't seen her since last November.  She has taught me about  Complete decongestive therapy (CDT).  It includes wearing a compression sleeve, Manual Lymphatic drainage (MLD is a type of gentle massage which promotes the natural drainage of the lymph, which carries waste products away from the tissues back toward the heart), wrapping the arm, exercise, and other self care.  Pheeww!  Learning to manage Lymphedema can be quite a task.  

I was right about the swelling.  The blue bar in the bar graph pictured above, represents the size of my left arm.  The red bar, represents the size of my right arm.  The first set of bars shows the difference between my arms when I first went to see Elsa last November.  The sixth set of bars was my last visit with her. What a difference!  

The last set of bars shows my current edema.  I had progressed to 13% which is considered moderate Lymphedema.  Elsa suggested that I have John come to my second visit so she could show him how to help me with MLD as well as learn how to wrap my arm.  I wore the wrapping on my arm overnight and removed it this morning.  My arm looks and feels so much better!  I think wrapping will make a BIG difference for me.

Feeling.......?

I often look for images or art work that can convey what I am feeling in a given moment.  I think this woman/statue represents some feelings I have been grappling with lately.  I have been "listening" to the feelings and trying to make sense of them, trying to understand them.  Loss..... I feel like I have lost a sense of normalcy through the ongoing cancer treatments.  I certainly have lost an ability to work in the same capacity I was accustomed to before.  I am REALLY bothered by that and wondering if I will ever get back to "normal," in that regard.  How things were BC (before cancer).  Maybe I never will.  Perhaps I will come to construct a "new normal" and learn to be okay with that in time.  I hope so.

I am learning that I can mourn character traits that were important to me.  Some traits make me feel like....me.  When I no longer seem to have them, I miss them.  (Multi-tasking, anyone?  Maybe losing that ability isn't so bad....)

On the flip side, I can see myself shedding some undesirable traits as well.  An unforgiving heart, for example.  An ability to let go of past hurts and perceived wrongs.  Grudges that I held on to for years, going..going....GONE!  Now, if I could just figure out how to keep all the good traits/abilities from BC and lose all the bad traits, then I could be SUPERWOMAN!!

Change....

The one sure thing in life...... is change.  I have had a lot of thoughts and feelings running through me lately.  It has been difficult to find the time to sit down and write about them.  SIGH.....Time management, just one of the many things that I am finding different/challenging since my latest surgery.  

Physically, I am feeling pretty good.  I have started riding my bike and going for long walks.  Trying to recover some of the physical strength lost since my most recent surgery.  Physical strength is not the only thing that seems to come and go during my cancer treatment.  Right now, I seem to be struggling with memory (chemo fog-BIG time) multi-tasking, focusing, organizing, and the ability and desire to get through my beloved to-do lists. 

 I have been challenged on this front before.  Long ago, Fibromyalgia forced me to accept that I have different limits than my peers 😒.  It was difficult at first.  I experienced anger and frustration that I didn't have the energy to do everything I wanted during the course of a day.  If I did "too much," I would pay for it with muscle aches that felt like the flu and a day or two in bed.  BLAAHH!!  Now I am moving at an even slower pace.  I don't know why this is taking me by surprise. After all, it is cancer treatment, not for the faint of heart.  I continually bump up against my lack of patience in one regard or another.  

Lots of opportunity to increase my patience throughout this experience, Ha Ha.  I am reminded of a scene from a movie (of course I can't remember the name of it with my chemo brain right now.) But a woman is speaking with God. In her previous prayers, she asks God to bless her with patience.  In the conversation, she questions why her patience has not improved. God tells her that when she asks for patience, He blesses her with the OPPORTUNITIES to choose to apply patience.   In our human way of doing things, we ask for a change and expect it right away.  That is not always God's way.  I am trying to trust in His timing and His way of doing things.

HAIR we go again!

2 months worth of growth.

So excited and impatient about my hair continuing to grow!😝  It is not coming back in a uniform manner or as quickly as I would like, but it is coming back!  My eyelashes and eyebrows are about 90% gone.  Wondering when they will start to come back.  Sure hope it will be soon.  Our family stylist told me about Nioxin products so I am going to give them a try and see if they help with growing the hair.... Time will tell.

Happy Birthday!

This is the Birthday card my father sent to me.  It has a great reggae happy bday tune.  Keep singing it over and over!  Today is a great day because I am alive and breathing and just feeling pretty good!  Cancer has given me a whole new perspective on Birthdays.  I no longer struggle with getting older!  In fact, I embrace it, I celebrate it!  Another bday, means I have been here on earth with my family and friends another year and I hope to be here for many more!  It is a time to celebrate living and life, and that is just what I plan to do!