Bring on the Wigs!!

Sophie and Jamison goofing around in my new wigs!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!  I know it has been a bit since I wrote and I apologize, don't want you to worry when I am not posting.  I have had two chemo treatments of a different drug called Taxol.  So far the side effects have been much easier to bear than the initial 4 treatments.  Thank Goodness!  The one I seem to deal with the most is fatigue so I sleep a lot!  That and and some diarrhea but nothing Imodium AD can't handle!  10 more treatments to go.  I am taking this week off since my Dad and step-mom are coming to town .

Our neighbor and cancer buddy Glen Gunter talked me into trying out some wigs which I had absolutely no interest in to begin with.  Once I started trying them on, I felt normal-looking for the first time since I lost my hair.  A couple of days prior to the wig-try-on, I had told my husband that when I look in the mirror, I hardly recognize myself anymore.  There was some sadness about that.  

When I wear the wigs, I notice that I no longer get stares!  People constantly compliment me on my new hair style not realizing they are wigs.  It's great!  So I have decided to embrace it all and have fun with all the different kinds of fashions for the head!  Wigs, wraps, beanies.  Bring it on!

Just do today.

I received an uplifting story from a dear friend of mine in Tucson and I wanted to share it.  Elder Kristofferson one of the 12 Apostles of our Church spoke of his mothers fight against breast cancer.  At treatment # 3 of 16 radiation treatments, she told her mother, "I can't keep doing this-it's too much."  Her mother said, "Well can you do today?"  Answer, "Yes."  "Then just do today."  

"Just do today."  Words to live by.

Self care Just got more Complicated

Doing my exercises to help combat neuropathy.

Yesterday, Wednesday, was my first treatment of  Paclitaxol.  I have 11 more once a week for the next 11 weeks.  That is assuming that there are no complications.  So..all my prayer warriors, please pray that my body will be able to tolerate the Taxol and that I will be able strong enough to see this treatment through to completion.  I would like to stay on track with these treatments and be done as soon as possible!

Common side effects:

~Low blood counts.  White and red blood cells and platelets may temporarily decrease.

~Hair loss.  I still have my eyebrows and eyelashes but I am told it is more than likely that they will go with these treaments.

~Arthralgias & myalgias, pain in the joint and muscles.

~Peripheral neuropathy.  Numbness and tingling of the hands and feet.

~Nausea and vomiting.

~Diarrhea.

~Mouth sores.

I could experience all, some, or none of these side effects with Taxol.  We just have to wait and see.  So far, between surgery and AC chemo, I have experienced everything but vomiting and neuropathy.  Which means I feel somewhat prepared or have an idea of what to expect having experienced many of these symptoms already.  Up until now, they have been bearable and I pray that may continue to be the case.

Swaddled in Love

Last night my daughter Sophie (far left) surprised me with her Church young womens group.  They are called Beehives and they have been busy!
With the help of their leaders they made this beautiful quilt for me!  Each of them made a personalized square with their name on it.  Some of the messages read, " Life is full of great and wonderful people with great hearts.  But the best people are the people who never give up!  So never, ever give up."

"Strength is someone going through cancer who smiles through it all."

"When life kicks you, let it kick you forward."

"You've been in my prayers."

"I love my Warrior Mom."

"God gives His toughest battles to his toughest soldiers."

"Life isn't a matter of milestones but of moments."

It is a great treasure and so very comfy!  I took a nap with it today for the first time.  Love it and love you girls!

Round 4 of Chemo, Soooo DONE!

Round 4 of chemo means I am officially 1/4 of the way through chemo treatments!  John took me out to lunch and bought me an Air pad to celebrate.  Now he won't have to share his anymore!

This picture was taken Wednesday and the side effects of chemo didn't hit until day 3, which means Friday. Haven't been able to get out of bed the last two days and I am thinking that tomorrow will be more of the same. So glad to be finihed with A/C. Two week break and they start me on another IV drug called Taxol.  Once a week for 12 weeks.

I want to take a moment to sing praises to my amazing husband John Enfield.  When I am not operational, he just steps in and does it all.  Grocery shopping, laundry, chauffering the kids here, there, and everywhere.  He takes on all my duties not to mention nurses aid fetching me food, drinks and anything else I might need.  So grateful to have him with me on this journey.  Couldn't do it without him.  Love you Honey.

Grand Canyon road trip

It was fall break this last weekend and I was too sick to take the kids anywhere fun:  Auntie Mindy and Uncle Mark to the rescue!!  They came down with beloved cousins Porter and Jackson and took our kids to the North Rim of the Grand Canyon!  Their timing was perfect!  Our kids had so much fun as evidenced by the above pictures!  Thanks for serving our family during this difficult time.  We love you guys.

So someone ordered a shawl from Macy's and had it delivered to me.  Is anyone going to take credit?  I love shawls so thanks a ton!

The service continued with meals brought in by the Milne's, Clarke's, and Johnson's.  Today a week after chemo, I was feeling well enough to get out of the house.  It has been a long week, most of it in bed.  Visits from Lisa J. and Laurie H. helped break up the monotony and were bright spots for me.  Do I know the best people or what?

The Robe by Mercy River

Yesterday I had a moment.  Round 3 of chemo has been rough and I spent the last 3 days in bed.  I was contemplating my mortality.  Will I get through this?  If I do, will the cancer come back again in a different area of my body?  What would I do?  How would I react, etc. etc.  I think these thought processes are natural given the circumstances.  Yes, I know, I am only Stage 2b but when you are sicker than sick, your thoughts can wander.

A song came on the radio.  The Robe by Mercy River.  It resounded with me in that moment and gave me a sense of calm and peace.

Faithful woman reached through
the crowd
And her hands gently touched
Your robe
And You through Your grace
made her whole
And now my broken body is
fading fast
And like her I'm searching
through the crowds
Desperate to find you somehow

And I'm reaching for that robe
I know that You can make me
whole
But if its not meant to be that way
If I can't stay
Then just wrap me in that robe
and hold me when I go

If you call me home to You
Please help those who love me understand
We are still held together by Your
hands

I'm reaching for that robe
I know that You can make me
whole

Beautiful, beautiful song.  Rescued me in a low moment.